For the rest of the week I was truly hoping that the third time's a charm. All this peanut-butter-hold-the-jelly stuff was getting hard to swallow. It was do or die time. Little Spoon was having a birthday party and I was invited. Either I was getting laid this time or I was going to swear off women all together.
I got ready after work and drove to a bar in Little Spoon's town. Jasmine was there and very happy to see me. She gave me a hello hug and whispered in my ear "Hit on her tonight. We'll have our chance later." 'Okay,' I thought. 'That makes any decision making tonight a lot easier.'
The night was an interesting array of ups and downs. The girls were very flighty. Nobody seemed to stay put for very long and I spent much of the night talking to Jasmine. At one point one of Little Spoon's friends came up with a guy in tow. The music was loud so I had to assume that the round guy, beer in hand, didn't realize I could here him propositioning the girl that I had driven there to be with. The audacity of some people really baffles me. This was, in fact, the very reason that I don't like guys. I may be male, but I'm also the first to admit that guys are assholes. I waited for Little Spoon to tell him off and when it didn't happen initially I first considered punching him in the face and then considered going home with Jasmine instead. I mean, it wasn't like I was really with anyone here. She had only personally invited me and picked out a skirt for me because she knew I thought they were sexy.
Either way, she finally told him something and he walked away to the bar. I don't know exactly what she said, but it wasn't a 'no'. 'Damn women,' I thought. 'Why do they always have to be such a pain in the ass?' But with him gone for now I decided to go to the bathroom while I had the chance.
On my way back I again had the sudden urge to punch this guy in the face. Little Spoon had joined him up at the bar. Was this some sort of test? Was she wanting to see what I would do to get her? I hate playing games, but that's not to say I don't know how they work. I sat down at the table and took a drink of my Corona trying to play it cool. The bitter lime taste seemed to stain my lower lip and my mind started grinding at what possibilities lay before me. Either I A: Punch him B: Make out with Jasmine when she gets back or C: Finish my beer and leave.
I was still sober enough that my brain knew the right answer, but she did look pretty sexy in that short skirt and my hormones wanted to compromise. He seemed pretty drunk. Worse case scenario is I get kicked out of and drive home anyways. I walked up to the bar and asked Little Spoon "Is this guy still bothering you?" I could tell that my adrenaline was already pumping a little just because I don't exactly remember what she said but her and I ended up walking back over to the table and sitting down. Leaving the larger version of Tweedledum sitting there alone with his beer.
To this day I don't know if she was just testing me. I just know that I don't like anything that even feels like a test. Thankfully the rest of the night seemed to go a little easier. The bar closed and Jasmine had me take Little Spoon home. When I got there I was even invited to come inside, but on one condition. I couldn't stay. She wasn't ready for me to meet her kids, but I could lay down with her for a while.
Either way, she finally told him something and he walked away to the bar. I don't know exactly what she said, but it wasn't a 'no'. 'Damn women,' I thought. 'Why do they always have to be such a pain in the ass?' But with him gone for now I decided to go to the bathroom while I had the chance.
On my way back I again had the sudden urge to punch this guy in the face. Little Spoon had joined him up at the bar. Was this some sort of test? Was she wanting to see what I would do to get her? I hate playing games, but that's not to say I don't know how they work. I sat down at the table and took a drink of my Corona trying to play it cool. The bitter lime taste seemed to stain my lower lip and my mind started grinding at what possibilities lay before me. Either I A: Punch him B: Make out with Jasmine when she gets back or C: Finish my beer and leave.
I was still sober enough that my brain knew the right answer, but she did look pretty sexy in that short skirt and my hormones wanted to compromise. He seemed pretty drunk. Worse case scenario is I get kicked out of and drive home anyways. I walked up to the bar and asked Little Spoon "Is this guy still bothering you?" I could tell that my adrenaline was already pumping a little just because I don't exactly remember what she said but her and I ended up walking back over to the table and sitting down. Leaving the larger version of Tweedledum sitting there alone with his beer.
To this day I don't know if she was just testing me. I just know that I don't like anything that even feels like a test. Thankfully the rest of the night seemed to go a little easier. The bar closed and Jasmine had me take Little Spoon home. When I got there I was even invited to come inside, but on one condition. I couldn't stay. She wasn't ready for me to meet her kids, but I could lay down with her for a while.
Her alarm went off at 6AM and I began my trek home. I made a quick pass through the Baker and Barstow and Berdoo of the region. I felt like I was headed back to LA, into frantic oblivion: safety, obscurity, just another freak in the Freak Kingdom. Hungry, hung over, tired and still a little drunk, but at least I'd finally broken the trend.
I felt like this must have been the type of rigorous training that they put marines through on their last days of boot camp. a little breakfast, little sleep, work, drive out of town, drink, have strenuous sexual activities, sleep 1 hour, drive, lil food, blog about it while the sun rises and try to remember every detail. It's time for a fucking nap.
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